Beware the Russian Handbag

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Do you remember your school bully? The on who used to inflate like a particularly enthusiastic blowfish and hit on the weak or small just for the kicks. The same bully who when confronted with authority of some Prefect of Discipline suddenly broke down into tears and cried for mercy instantly metamorphosing from Tyrranosaurus Studenti to a Mosquito without a sting?. Well, I was reminded of our school bully – may his time in and out of prison be spent disproportionately – by this story on d-ive…

VALLETTA, (di-ve news)–October 4, 2007 — 1820CEST– A 26 year old man from Marsaxlokk was fined following a fight which took place because of a Russian girl. Timothy Briffa was in fact fined Lm300 by the court of magistrates presided by Edwin Grima, for causing slight injuries to 32 year old Elton John Caruana and 18 year old Malcolm Mallia.

The court listened to two conflicting versions of the facts. The prosecution, led by Inspector Carlo Spiteri, insisted that Briffa had harassed the Russian girl who was irritated by this and retaliated. This led to the intervention of Caruana and Mallia who tried to break up the fight with the consequence of Briffa punching them and injuring them slightly.

Briffa, on the hand denied all this saying that he had been walking and minding his own business when the Russian girl hit him with her handbag for no reason. The accused said that he was then suddenly assaulted by three youths and fled the scene in fear without even having spoken to any of them or the Russian girl. The police caught up with him later.

The court regarded the testimony of the accused as not credible since the injuries on the person of Caruana and Mallia could not have come from nothing. However the injuries were not of a serious nature with Caruana having to be treated with slight stitches due to a cut above his right eye.

Walking and minding his own business? Hit him with her handbag for no reason? What kind of psychological twistedness could justify the confidence of someone making such a statement.

“Who broke the glass Timmy?
It broke on it’s own ma… promise.
Of course it did. Here’s a chocolate.”

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